Becoming Earth (The 100 Bellarke)
by laCheshireCat
Summary: 10 years after Clarke decided to leave Camp Jaha everything has changed. Bellamy and her find themselves on opposite sides. Will they find a way to reunite between loss, pain and loyalty?
1. Chapter 1

"I'm not going in."

Bellamy turned around to look at Clarke. Not quite believing why she's saying that. "Ok... If you need forgiveness, I'll give that to you. You're forgiven!" He couldn't lose here so he laid every feeling he had for her into his voice but as soon as he said it he knew he couldn't change her mind.

"Take care of them for me." Tears glistened in her eyes as she was about to turn around.

"Clarke!" She wheeled around quickly desperation seeking onto her face. "I'm seeing their faces every day and it's just gonna remind me of what I did to get them here..."

"What we did! You don't have to do this alone." He was not going to let her go, he had to live with the same guilt so they could go through this together. Clarke looked back at Camp Jaha with finality, knowing that she won't come back to see it change over the years. She won't see her Mother, her friends Raven, Octavia, Jasper and Monty, she won't see Bellamy. But it was for the best, so they could live in peace and freedom. "I bear it so they don't have to."

"Where are you gonna go?"

"I don't know."

Clarke wrapped her arms around Bellamy tightly and kissed him on the cheek as final goodbye. "May we meet again." Without looking back she turned her back on the life she learned to know and love. The people she loved most. Every step took her into an unknown future but she knew she had to do it. As she was once told: a leader needs to be strong and bare the guilt so others can live without it.

"May we meet again."

10 years later

The Commander held her fist high into the air signalling her scouts to stop behind her and took off her skull mask. They stayed just behind the tree line but were still able to look down into the valley where people worked on cutting down all of the trees. It was a long time ago she last saw this place and she couldn't remember Camp Jaha being that massive. Almost half of the place was littered with small houses and tents already, intruding deeply into their territory. Now that the sky-people had more weapons there was no chance the forest-clan could fight them off on their own. That's why they send for her, the commander of all clans.

"They're disregarding our agreement. Teck, when did this start?"

The leader of the forest-clan kneeled down beside here looking down at the sky-people and taking off his mask as well. "They began three moons ago. We hoped they would stop, but they didn't. We called on you to get help from the other clans, commander."

"I see."

She stood up abruptly and made her way back into the forest, she had seen enough. Teck and his men followed close by as she followed the small path they came from back to the clearing where they left their horses. They were a group of ten including herself so she saw no problem to act right now. Climbing onto her horse she gathered her men around her.

"We're going to talk to the leader of the sky-people first. There must be a solution without a fight."

Three of the men grunted disapprovingly obviously wanting to hurt the trespassers but no one said a word against her decision. Sometimes being the commander had its perks although she swore to herself a long time ago never to be a leader again. But it was not her choice to make. Putting on her mask again she started into the direction of Camp Jaha.

Bellamy sat in the control centre of the camp planning the next improvements with Marcus. He became the second in command after Jaha left and Marcus became Chancellor. A lot changed in the last years. Many people from all over the area joined their community and they had no major fight with other grounders in almost 10 years. Their population grew steadily so they quickly had to expand their settlement and thanks to Raven they had electricity in almost every part of the camp by now. The remains of the Ark station still was the midpoint of everything and kind of resembled a town hall.

"Bellamy, do you really think it's a good idea to expand further into the valley? You know it's grounder territory." Marcus said as he pinched the bridge of his nose exhausted. He never fully recovered from the accident in the grounder village a decade ago.

"The land on the other side of the ark isn't as good as the valley and you know that. The grounders didn't show up as we first started building our houses in here so why should they show up now...?"

"Chancellor!" One of the guards stormed into the room clutching his gun tightly to his chest. "There's a group of Ten Grounders approaching camp quickly, sir!"

Marcus sighed and glanced over at Bellamy with a look that said 'I told you so'. Grabbing his gun from beside him Bellamy stood up and ordered the guard to bring him to the grounders. Marcus was in no condition to handle things like that. Bellamy almost took over everything, only listening to Marcus' decisions because he had to. Luckily they got along most of the time.

As Bellamy stepped outside of the Ark the group of grounders stopped right in front of him and a woman jumped off of her horse followed by one of her warriors. Judging by her clothing and her mask she was the commander. Obviously it wasn't Lexa anymore seeing that the woman's structure was more build and less petite. The other man stepped forward beside her.

"The commander wishes to speak to the leader of the sky people." He announces gruffly not showing any emotion which was typical for most grounders.

"That would be me." Bellamy spoke directed to the woman not addressing the buff looking man standing beside her. As he said that he saw her shoulders slightly stiffening but soon she stood as relaxed as before.

The commander stepped forward looking directly at Bellamy though her eyes were hidden in the shadows of the mask.

"Bellamy of the sky people. You are disregarding the agreement of our borders. We came here to discuss that issue." Her voice was without emotion as well and yet it sounded kind of strangled. Bellamy's eyes widened in shock as he recognized the undertone in her voice. A voice he didn't hear in forever although it changed a lot over the years. Her voice sounded hollow underneath her imperious tone. But it was still her.

Clarke.

Clarke Griffin was standing right in front of him as the commander of the grounders.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Back then...

The first tears started to fall as soon as she reached the shadows underneath the trees. She just left everything behind her. Her whole life. But it was better this way. She didn't know if she could bear the weight of her decisions or if she'd break under it. And she certainly didn't want anyone near her when she found out. Especially not Bellamy. It tore her heart into pieces as she turned her back on him and only then did she realize that she started to love him a long time ago. But there was no turning back now, her decision had been made.

She wandered south for a few months until she reached the coast and stayed there with one of the clans that didn't know her past. At first she missed everyone back at Camp Jaha but soon all those feelings faded into nothingness. She learned from one tribe's priest how to shut out her emotions to numb the pain she felt 24/7. She didn't want to shut everything out but the pain that ate at her heart became unbearable and left her no other choice.

She had travelled along the coast of North America for 5 years when she settled at a cliff with an abandoned, almost intact house. She built a new life alone and stayed as far away from any other humans as possible and every time old emotions started to bubble up, she raised a wall around her mind and shut everything out.

One night during her second winter staying at the small house she was painfully torn from her sleep. Panting she tried to sit upright but realized in horror that none of her limbs worked. Even her eyelids seemed to be glued shut. She knew that she was awake but she had no control over her body whatsoever.

"Clarke.." a small voice in the back of her mind shouted her name, trying to break through her mental barrier. Fear overwhelmed her because she was not in control anymore, she was trapped in her own body. It felt like grave inside of her.

"Clarke!" The voice grew louder as the barrier crumbled away under Clarkes horror.

"Who is this?" Clarke couldn't voice her words aloud so she tried talking in her mind.

"You don't remember me?" The female voice was even louder now, booming through her head and giving her a major headache.

"No.. That can't be you. NO!" Clarke was swallowed by desperation and panic as she recognized the voice, her emotions flooding back into her mind all at once so it felt like her head might explode any second now.

"It is better this way, Clarke. Shutting everyone and everything out will only tear your soul apart. Your soul is too important." Sorrow was evident in the voice only reminding Clarke of what she said to her a long time ago in a different life. 'Feelings are weaknesses.' "Clarke, I learned it the hard way, don't make the same mistake I did."

"Why are you in my head?" Clarke was beyond confused. She wanted to know why she couldn't move a single muscle in her body and why she was hearing Her voice.

"Deep down you know what's going on. I once told you how it worked. I'm dead, Clarke."

"NO! You.. you can't be dead!"

"But I am."

"Then why are you in my head? This is crazy!" Panting heavily Clarke tried to move again but after a few exhausting tries she stopped accepting that she couldn't move an inch. "Why is this happening?"

"My time is up, Clarke. It needs to be done."

"What needs..."

"Fou Clarke Griffin kom Skaikru yu gonplei ste odon. Gyon op nodotaim a heda kom Trigedakru.

Mebi oso na hit choda op nodotaim."

Choking Clarke sat up straight on her mattress trying to catch her breath. Her body felt like she didn't take a breath in forever. Her head was throbbing painfully and she clutched her hands to her temples letting her shoulders slouch down. Her life had a new purpose even though she didn't choose it.

Lexa chose her.

She was the commander of the grounders.

Present time

Clarke followed Bellamy into the Ark not hesitating on the threshold. Bellamy noticed her flash of fear as he announced that he was in charge. She had hoped to speak to someone she didn't know so well but the luck was not on her side today.

Bellamy held the door to a small conference room open for her. She stepped in without a look in his direction and instructed her warriors to wait outside not listening to her protests. She took off her mask and turned around to the man she thought she loved but those feelings disappeared a long time ago. Bellamy took a step towards her reaching for her face but letting his arm fall back to his side immediately. "Clarke.. I didn't know you were still alive." His eyes were full of emotions but Clarke couldn't let herself feel.

"I am. Let's talk about business." Her voice stayed cold and distant.

"Why didn't you come back?" Bellamy's eyes pleaded with hers to show any sign of emotion. Clarke turned away from him and took a deep breath.

"It doesn't matter anymore."

Apparently Bellamy saw her actions as a crack in her facade so he pushed deeper. "You left us! Your friends, your only family! You left me! Don't you think I deserve an explanation?"

"I told you why I had to do it. This was in the past. You are in the past. My future is elsewhere." She had to make sure Bellamy understood this. She was not the same person as before, she changed. And there was no space for friends and family in her life, let alone a lover.

To her surprise Bellamy grabbed her hand and intertwined their finger tightly not letting go as Clarke tried to pull her hand away.

"Don't." Her voice was small. Weak.

"I love you Clarke! I loved you longer than you know. I even loved you before I knew I did. I want you back in my life and now that I get the chance to get you back I'm not letting you go again! I made this mistake 10 years ago and I regretted it till today!"

"Don't!" Clarke ripped her hand away from Bellamy's and whirled around surprised of her own actions. She was showing emotions. For the first time in years and she didn't like it at all.

"STOP TRYING! The Clarke you knew is gone! There is only me now, the commander of the grounders and that is all I'll ever be till my fight is over!" Her eyes blazed furious and her hands twitched to the knife on her belt. She considered threatening Bellamy but she couldn't do it.

"I will not negotiate with you like that! Send someone to my camp and I will talk to him. Otherwise there will be consequences and if I were you I wouldn't underestimate us."

Clarke grabbed her mask and stormed out of the room. She ignored Bellamy's shouts as she jumped onto her horse and took off into the woods close followed by her fellow men. She hated fleeing but it was the only way she wouldn't make a huge mistake.

Bellamy wasn't fast enough to stop her but nevertheless a small smile snuck its way onto his face. The old Clarke was still there. He saw it in her eyes. Now that he knew that she lived he wasn't willing to stop trying to get her back. Not until his own fight was over.

"We will meet again."

\- translation of Lexa's oath: "Former Clarke Griffin of the sky people, your fight is over. Get back up as the commander of the tree people. May we meet again." -


End file.
